For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery. Galatians 5:1
“I want to be perfect so I can be liked. I’ve never been perfect. My spouse expects me to be perfect. My children expect me to be perfect. My boss expects me to be perfect. My church family expects me to be perfect. I expect me to be perfect.”
Do you have these messages playing in your head? Is it possible they could be playing and you are clueless, yet they are causing you to feel unhappy because you just can’t seem to measure up in your own mind?
All of our lives we have been receiving messages from the world around us, from the people we care about. Some have been positive and others negative. Your perception of these messages can be liberating or a prison for life.
Have you ever been compared to someone else: a sibling; a friend, or relative? How did it make you feel? Did you feel you were not good enough to be you, but had to strive to be like someone else? Did you wonder what was wrong with you? Why couldn’t you be accepted as you?
Messages can be silent stalkers that sabotage your progress in every area of your life, whether it is personal, business or spiritually related.
Are you the victim of such a message? When I was 9 years old my grandmother asked me to get her a glass of water. I filled it to the top. As I walked toward her the water began spilling. She scolded me, “You can’t do anything right.”
What do you think I did the next time? When that time came I was eager, I knew I could do it right this time because I put less water in the glass. She repeated her first message, “You can’t do anything right,” because I put less water in the glass.
Messages: positive or negative cause us to strive. Some of us have spent our whole lives trying to please that person from the past. At work we strive to be recognized as doing something pleasing. In our relationships we are hard on ourselves, wondering whether we are good enough. Even when it comes to spiritual things we want to be perfect and become disillusioned when our journey finds us falling short.
Have you discovered that even after trying to do everything right and always attempting to achieve optimal performance that you still don’t feel you have done it right; you still doubt and wonder?
What is wrong with your perfection message? You are always reaching but never arriving. Once you have arrived it didn’t satisfy. We feel sadder than before.
No matter how we try to perfect ourselves we will miss the target. Our attempt at perfection leads to unhappiness and disappointment. We discover the excitement of getting but once it’s gotten we feel it was meaningless.
You may even ask, “Why did I have to do this? I thought it would be a big accomplishment, make me feel better, but I don’t.”
Whose standards are we trying to measure up to? I have tried to subconsciously measure up to my grandmother’s expectations/performance. What I have discovered: when I turned my human imperfections over to God, realizing that I was powerless to deal with my imperfections, but allowed them to be spiritually transformed His way, it changed my perspective and life.
Perfection God’s way leads to a happier, more fulfilling life.
Let me know what you think.
Keep the faith,
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